Could it be for real!!??

I bravely stepped on the scale this morning... It read 110lbs!!!!!!!??? Yesterday at the gym I was 113lbs on their scale. It was night and I had clothing on. Could I seriously have lost 3lbs? I'm going to weigh in again at the gym and compare the numbers. 110lbs would be FN fabulous!! I mean, I know it's probably a lot of water weight but WHATEVER! I'll take it lol!

Yesterday went pretty well ;) I only consumed coffee, 3 little cookies (under 200 calories), and of course WATER! It wasn't healthy food but I'm still pleased with the calorie intake. I went to the gym and did a yoga class for an hour, did some strength training on my legs and ass, and took a steam. It was Divine but not enough exercise :( I really should have done some cardio! Fuck! Got to make it up today...Damn it!

Today feels as if it will be another "good" day! I woke up without panic for once! I'm happily sipping my coffee and getting my caffeine buzz on. The agenda for the day is major restriction and I'm most definitely hitting the gym for cardio, pilates, and yoga! Oh yeah, I MUST DRINK MORE WATER!! My water intake is pathetic!

The count down to returning back to CA and my hubby is beyond close.....6 FREAKIN DAYS!!!!! I've come to terms, that I'm not returning with my GW. That doesn't mean I'm giving up however! I'll lose as much as humanly possible and when I get home I'll continue! I'm excited and nervous at the same time. I have so much to do before I leave and it's overwhelming me beyond belief! How the hell am I supposed to get all my belongings back in 1 suitcase and a carry on? I'm a clothing whore and refuse to leave my treasures behind! Geesh, my make up alone needs it's own suitcase lol! This shall be interesting!

Wish me luck..hehe
Hope you lovelies are well!!!
xo

Good Morning Dolls!

Well, I'm still FN 113lbs. Again, DAMN IT! My count down to losing weight and returning home to CA, is not going as planned :( I only have a week now to lose before I fly back. Realistically I know it's impossible to lose 113lbs. I mean it's science and common sense! If I could at least lose 3lbs and get down to 110lbs, I suppose I could live with that in the time being. 3lbs is VERY doable! More is encouraged of course! I'm just going to have to dress "smart". Wear adorable clothing still but adorable clothing that hides FAT! Things like flowy sundresses! I live on a beach in a hippy town. You can totally get away with the boho chic look( I adore fashion and clothing). I'll just keep working my ass off with exercise and restriction and get right back down to my goal weight! I can't wait to start race walking on the beach again :) I'm going to keep this positive attitude up and hold on to it with dear life!

As fo today, I've been lazy all morning....Watching TV and glued to , the lappy top! My Salsa class and NIA class is not until this evening, so I'm hitting the gym later in the evening. Their is a Vinyasa Flow class but IDK if my soar body can do it?? I really hope so! The sauna is on the agenda as well. I just adore a good steam! I LOVE HOW WARM IT IS!!! I've consumed a McDonald's large coffee with 2 creams and 1 splenda (IDK the cals??). I'll have a little something before the gym ( really I'll just end up drinking a energy drink lol)! After the gym a little mini fast! That's the plan but it always seems to change. We shall see what my neurotic brain chooses!

OMG! I really can't believe I'm going home. It's starting to set in that I can no longer hide and isolate! I'm going back to my life. Back to reality! It scares the sh*t out of me! I'm overwhelmed and nervous. Anxiety is dwelling in me. Just getting a job is overwhelming to me! That's pathetic but I've got to be strong! I CAN DO THIS!

Any who, HAPPY MONDAY...I adore Monday's because it's the beginning of the week and a fresh start. A clean slate :) Hope you dolls are doing fabulous! Thanks again for the comments! They really make my day...xo

Once again I broke even...Fast Post

This will be short and sweet...I'm in a bit of a time crunch....

Still 113lbs....ARGG!! Once again I binged like a little food whore!! I worked out like a mad women, so I didn't gain but didn't lose. DAMN IT!

Today I went to the gym and did 1hour and 15 min. in a cardio class, 1 hour and 15 min. on weights, and 40 min. on the treadmill. It felt freakin fantastic!! I'm bummed I didn't get any yoga in today :( Oh well, tomorrow. I'm doing fabulous with calories, as long as I keep it up for the rest of the day! I basically have 9 days left to lose WEIGHT....FML! I know I'm not going to lose 13lbs in time but that is not going to stop me from trying! I'm still smoking ciggs here and there :/ Oppsies..hehe!

Hope you dolls are doing fantastic!!! Thanks for all the kind words and reality check!
xo

 

Broke even

Sorry for being MIA lately :/ I was off binging and isolating. Luckily I broke even and didn't gain any weight. Still 113lbs. I just found out I have 2 weeks to lose weight before returning home to CA!!! I would like to get down to 100lbs but IDK if losing 13lbs in 2 weeks is realistic. I'm going to do my very best however! Yesterday went Fabulous! I only drank a bit of a Red Bull!! I'm not exactly sure how many cals but I don't believe it was more then 100! I didn't workout as much as I would have liked but I managed to get 20 min. on the elliptical in, a Pilate's class, and a Hatha yoga class in! It was all a bit too easy but really relaxing :) I did wake up feeling a little lighter and my tummy bloat went down a bit! Today I'm going back to the gym to do more cardio and classes!! I'm just going to do the same as yesterday and consume as little cals possible! Okay, the count down begins. I have some serious weight to lose and only 12 days/two weeks to lose it!! I'm kinda excited to see how much I can lose :/ it's that sick and twisted excited. My gym membership runs out on the 31st, so I'm without the gym the 1st-3nd :( I hate working out at home but I'll have to make do.

I also went to thearapy yesterday. I really really didn't want to go but was glad when I did. I always come out of it better then I went in. Anyways, we discussed me moving back and I lied my ass off saying I was much better...blah blah blah...She ate it up. She gives me the best tips to calm my anxiety and understand myself. I'll miss our sessions. Same with my group thearapy sessions. When I return home I have no health insurance! IDK what the hell I'm going to do for thearapy and meds!!

I'll check back in later doll's!

recovering once again from a binge :/

Last night's binge did in fact make me gain :( When I weighed in at the gym today it was 115lb...I'm pretty sure it'll go back to 113lbs tomorrow??? The gym went fantastic!!! I did an hour and 15 min. Vinyasa yoga class, 30 min. on the elliptical, and a Kiryo yoga class for another hour and 15 min. Calories on the other hand have not been so fantastic. I have consumed 800 already and I'm STOPPING right NOW!!! I just have to be "good" the rest of the night, have some laxie tea and finish off my liter water bottle!

AHHH, the whole time at the gym I was comparing bodies again.....it drives me mad and fills me with jealousy!!!


Nightie Night Luv's
xo

Feelin Peachy!

I did fab today! 1hour of Vinyasa yoga, 15 min. on the elliptical,  drink a liter of water, and only ate salad (organic) and raw almonds! I went to my group therapy and presented a level from our work book. I passed :) I also just just had a nice time getting out and conversing with other human beings lol! Weighing in less today made the day a bit more exciting!! I can't wait to weigh in tomorrow! I'm going to have the same kind of agenda for tomorrow....I'm going to hit another 1 hour Vinyasa class, then do about an hour of cardio on the machines, and end the workout with a nice Kyiro yoga class!! I will also basically eat the same...Maybe I'll take a steam and sauna!!??

I hope all you luv's are well!
xo

FUCK FUCK FUCK!!! I binged after I wrote about my fantastic day....What the hell is wrong with me???!!

YOU CAN NOW LEAVE COMMENTS LOL!!!

I fixed my comment problem! YAY!

So, I weighed in at the gym today...113lbs(clothes on)!!!! IDK if my scale was broken or I lost 3 pounds but I'll take it!!! Thank goodness, 116lbs was overwhelming me!!! I did a Vinyasa yoga class for an hour and 15 min. on the elliptical :/ I wish I would have done more!! The whole gym trip I checked out other women's bodies....I'm not bi really, I'm just body obsessed!! It's pathetic but passes the time lol! It is also motivation while your working out!! I haven't eaten anything yet but have drank a venti coffee with a bit of milk from Starbucks. I'm still riding a bit of a caffeine buzz! I have my group therapy tonight :/ I never want to go but once I get dolled up and there, I end up having a nice time! I'm going to present my level 4 tonight! Besides, it passes the time from 5-8pm and no food is involved! There are also 2 smoke breaks...I quit but I may just have one for therapy! Wish me luck! I'm off to doll up and obsess about my appearance....